HOW TO DESCRIBE THE ESSENCE OF JUST WHO YOU ARE...

Sometimes as elusive as a vapor trail
As highly charged as a third rail
As welcome as a long-awaited letter in the mail...

You are all of these.

If it please you to just smile at me,
It would, I know, set me completely free...

from all the plain, mundane, sad, bad things...
that can and do happen to the best of us...

Do I fuss too much?
Such is the way of me, I guess...
as I sit here, almost overwhelmed by the wonder
that is you...
and through the long to be spent years,
as you wipe away my tears,
shake off all the fears that would consume this one,

through the fun, joy and times we celebrate,
with you, I would never feel second-rate...
and as i stand finally at heaven's gate,

i would say
because I could say,
it was worth it all...

THAT is the essence of just who you are.

A star...to shine...always...
and forever...
more.

Essences C 2007
by Dustybear

BEARPIECES -

DIME A DANCE -

The Saga of

Frankie and Tess

Book 1 - Part 2 / The Plan

From Chapter 7...

"Howard and I have something to tell you two sweet boys," she said, looking from Frankie to Kenny and back.

"Yes, mom?" Frankie and Kenny said simultaneously…while holding hands under the table and squeezing said hands and also while trying to keep from fainting. Pretty quickly, their brows began to show beads of anticipatory “fear-dew!” Yep. Something told both of them this was not going to go well. They looked at their mother and gave sidelong glances to each other, and also to Howard who was looking singularly uninvolved in the calamity that was about to unfold. That, of course was his well-worn chosen path…after years of having been married to Elke.

"Honey! Both of you Honey’s!”

Elke flashed her biggest smile…"Howard and I…are…in!

That's what you need to know, and BOYS! NOTHING ON THIS EARTH is going to keep us from helping you. We just need to know where you want us to go…and what you want us to do! Where do we…

Uh, what's that word Howard? Oh yes!

IN – FIL – TRATE!”

Elke accentuated each syllable just so her sons wouldn’t miss her meaning. Then she settled back in her chair and proceeded to just sit there…all smiling and self-confident and,

for lack of a better word, looking SPUNKY!

Frankie, totally taken aback, lost his grip and then very unceremoniously and very very ungracefully; he fell off his chair. ALWAYS the take-charge type, that boi. ALWAYS in control. Yep yep. He had turned absolutely white and literally fell off his chair, while Kenny gasped.

Yep, these were definitely S U P E R H E R O' S! No question.

I'm sure the director of the FBI would be beaming with pride at these two hardcore WOOSIES right about now.

Frankie was looking pretty sheepish as he struggled to get back up into his chair. Eric looked down at him and thought to himself, "Oh God! If that is all it takes…”

Then Eric looked at Kenny who had gone as white as a sheet. You could hear a pin drop in that room about then, and through it all? Elke just continued to merely sit there, looking all SPUNKY!; (As I sat and watched all this, there wasn’t a scintilla of doubt in my mind. Not only did Elke know exactly what she had just done, she was now reveling in the results. No dummy she.

Frankie wanted to die, and Kenny wanted to help him and then commit suicide.

"Mom! You can’t…I mean…uh, oh God. Frankie, say something for God's sake..

MOM!

DAD! Please. Talk to her!"

(Howard was obviously being no help at all…for he had learned over the years that when Elke made up her mind, she just jolly well made up her mind and that was that. Period!)

"FRANKIE!" Kenny was pleading now. "Mom. What ARE you talking about?" Frankie said after finally finding his voice.

"I am talking about helping my two little boys of course…and their, uh, ‘friends.’ What kind of parents would we be if we weren't there for our own children when they obviously need us. Right, Howard?"

"Absolutely, dear."

Frankie went white again. Kenny turned even whiter, and it got REAL quiet…as Elke just sat there looking all SPUNKY!

(A bit smug, too…if you ask me. But then nobody did so I just thought it!)

Frankie looked at Kenny. Kenny looked at Frankie, and then at Tess, who was looking a bit peaked herself. Then Frankie looked at his shoes and then at Eric. Then back to Tess, and then he looked back to Kenny.

Then at his shoes again. "I need new ones!" Frankie thought to himself... "OH GOD!"

Then Frankie looked at Billy Ray and then pleadingly at Rose, who looked back at Frankie with a “gotcha” gleam in her eye, who looked at Jake, who looked at Elke and, to Frankie's surprise, smiled.

"By God, the woman has…SPUNK!” Jake thought to himself.

Frankie still didn't have too good a grip on that chair he was in, and Kenny was about squeezing the life out of Frankie's hand under the table. In fact, he was coming periously close to completely cutting off all of the circulation in it!

Kenny just looked at his mother…and what he saw was SPUNK and determination.

"Oh God...not that, Mom! Oh please, Mom…not THAT look,” Kenny thought to himself…for he knew Elke when she got “determined.” In fact, both of her sons knew ‘that look’ only too well.

Then, Billy Ray, who had been totally silent throughout the whole exchange, said, "Mrs. Mc Alester, welcome aboard! You too, sir,” as he directed his gaze to Howard.

Frankie and Kenny looked at Billy like he had taken

TOTAL leave of his senses and had just totally lost it. Gone mad…stark raving mad.

Then, Jake, who had also been quiet, said, "I echo that…and by God those damn mugs better know one thing. You DON’T mess with mama Bears when their cubs are endangered...trust me! I got a mom too, ma'am…and I wouldn't tangle with that woman, at gunpoint…'specially if she’s the one holding the gun!”

Elke sat, smiling.

Yep. Elke has spunk all right, and she knew exactly what Jake meant even if she didn’t know his mama. Elke didn't have to know her. Yep, Elke had spunk all right, and we were gonna find that out, too. BIG TIME!

Frankie felt nauseous and Kenny felt numb. By now so was Frankie's hand…and before anyone else could say anything, another entry came galloping into the mix.

"RYAN? TONY?"

"MAMA?" ...Tony.

"MOTHER?" ...Ryan.

“Oh God! “ I thought, while laughing to myself. She nodded to me, and I said..."Mornin', Ofelia!"

Frankie fell off his chair again, which was getting a bit tedious…not to mention painful. Kenny thought he was gonna throw up. Rose, being a woman and fervently so sat beaming!

“O KAY! YEP, YEP! This is gonna be a real humdinger," Rose thought to herself. Billy Ray sat smiling and thinking the same thing.

Eric, at that point, began to wonder at exactly what point he had completely lost control of this entire operation. Perhaps his superiors had been right, but it was a teeny bit late for that! Mentally, he began the suddenly painful mental process of adjusting to these new circumstances. Rosie heard him sigh.

HELL, the entire planet heard him sigh. She saw him roll his eyes and she knew he was thinking…and WHAT he was thinking was..."Oh, dear Lord,” and he began to reflect on the time he had felt bullets whizzing over his head…and how much simpler that seemed now. "Oh, dear Lord...please!"

MYSTIC MISTY MOONLIGHT

In a mystic misty moonlight..my love grows warm..ur form & substance..reflected in my heart..never part..from me..The icy reality of my previous pain & hurt..flirt with melting..pelting me with droplets of a possible..new..mood...an interlude..an eternal flame..name..ur passion...ur desire..fire..me with ur love..move me above & beyond the ice age where I have dwelt..I knelt upon the altar of hope..cope with the newly changing landscape..make me live again..love then...life anew...few if any have made me feel like you do...new horizons loom...sweep the lingering ice away..like a new broom...clear the decks for living..giving me new visions..no derisions here...come near..spark the fire that longs to up..cup my chin in ur hands..he fans the flames..fuels them higher with his touch..much to be said & done..but Hon..I want ur bright white hot heat..beating inside me...free me from the past..vast love awaits in me..for you...TOO LONG..have I waited for heat of passion the promise of you brings..sings..my heart..YES...to you..love for you..love 4 me

BEARPIECES - THE DUSTYBEAR CHRONICLES - Bk 2 Dustybear Takes A Chance ch 75

CHAPTER SEVENTY FIVE -

THE PERFECT STORM

*************************************************************

There is no surprise more magical than the surprise

of being loved:

It is God's finger on man's shoulder." - Charles Morgan

**************************************************************************

The Storm continued, unabated

both inside and out...

Both storms wielding ENORMOUS

force...and power.

*************************************************************

OUTSIDE, the lightning CRACKLED...

Cloud to cloud

cloud to ground

It's AWESOME POWER tangible...visible,

in the darkened sky.

INSIDE, the lightning CRACKLED too...

Person to person

and back

IT'S AWESOME POWER tangible...visible

and equal to that which was flashing through the

sky OUTSIDE.

THUNDERING...both inside and out.

ROCKING the house from without and within.

Mother Nature in all her breathtaking power...

Love in all it's breathtaking power...

Fitting almost, seemingly...that it should all be
going on simultaneously.

I could SEE the flashes,
and HEAR the rumbling
OUTSIDE...

I could FEEL the flashes,
and SENSE the rumbling..

of two hearts
INSIDE...

**************************************************************

We stood at the window for the longest time...

just looking out...at the wonder...of the storm...

Rico pressed HARD against my back...

his long torso...TIGHT...

his long arms encircling me...

each of us with a coffee mug in one hand...

but scarcely noticing them...

I could feel his power to be sure...

and yes...his passion,
obvious in ITS intensity...
in a way...

And yet,
I could feel his gentleness too.

Perhaps his sensitive, creative side.....

I have always loved that side of Rico.

It's not that I don't love his
'TAKE CHARGE'

no-nonsense side too...

His 'LETS GO FOR IT BEAR...
GET IT DONE and go on' side.

His ability to FOCUS on something

with an intensity almost beyond reason,

and similar to MY ability to do the same...

AND YET...
be able to multi-task almost to perfection

even BETTER than I....

and his drop-dead funny side too.

His crazy slapstick zany nutsy funny side..

SUCH a good match to my own....

NOT a duplicate...

a COMPLEMENT...

virtually, a compliment as well....

Even his insecure side too...

his vulnerable side...

ALMOST...but NOT quite...masked...

by his defensive barrier...

which I am privileged to be able to
see AROUND...

That place where he keeps his pain, and past hurts..

and his....longing....for something better...

his HUNGER...for FREEDOM...from the childhood...

the uncaring and unsympathetic parents..

the brothers who loved him....

Ryan and Rusty...

although caring...about him...

but never truly understanding him...

and I surmise that they still don't....

AND, from the aloneness he has always felt...

perhaps...a bit like Jonathan..Brenda's Father...

TRULY, an anomaly in his own family...

YEP...

ALL his sides....

Yeh..I did..and DO...love them ALL....

and his MIND....

GOD that boi has a QUICK mind...

always thinking...

a tribute to his upbringing perhaps...

but there it is...

*********************************************************

WE STOOD...

lost...

in our thoughts..

in the storm... raging...outside..

in the storm...raging...INSIDE

and for some strange reason...

that I don't EVEN BEGIN to understand...

SOMETHING....was happening...

something...FINAL...

something...FINALLY....settling itself...

as we stood there..

LOCKED together...

our bodies, our hearts, and our emotions..

merged...

almost ONE...

I could feel it....

oh yes I could...

I could tell that Rico did too...

I almost expected to hear a CLUNK...

as SOMETHING...kinda...dropped...into place...

like a padlock...

or a deadbolt...or sumfin...

and in a way...I THINK......I DID...

WEIRD.....

but...there it is...

All of a sudden, as if that were EVEN...

REMOTELY possible....

He pulled me TIGHTER to him...

giving me the feeling of being COMPLETELY SURROUNDED

by this boi....

Then he stood...leaning down....

he, kissing the side of my neck...

softly...gently....

right below my right ear....

the little tip of his tongue...

just BARELY...grazing my skin..

His soft lips...moving slowly..sensuously...

along my neck...

I could FEEL....NOTHING...but Rico...

I could HEAR...NOTHING...but his heart....

and mine..

beating TOGETHER...

yep...

Something went CLUNK...

and that was that...

PERIOD...

FINIS...

SAYONARA...

END OF DISCUSSION...

and we BOTH knew it...

Then, all of a sudden...

off in the distance...

I saw it...

a piece of sky....BLUE....sky......

VERY....

INTENSELY...BLUE....

contrasted against the darker gray of the clouds

just ahead...

THEN.......

I KNEW....

THE STORM....was moving on....

slowly....but deliberately...

It had done its work...

and now it was moving on...

and NOTHING would EVER be QUITE the same again...

It would perhaps continue...somewhere else...

but HERE?

The storm...PERFECT...in its intensity...

was moving on...

and in its wake...

a sense of newness that you COULD SEE...

a gleam of sunshine...through the clouds...

the water GLISTENING on the tips of the grass...

YEP..NEWNESS...

peacefulness...

BEAUTY...

A settled QUIETNESS....

AND, THEN...

as we stood looking out...

I saw it...

a misty-tinged glistening tableau....

out by the edge of the porch steps...

Two little flowers...probably the first of the Spring...

beginning to gently slowly open...

Rico saw them too...

and his lips just stopped...on my skin..

on the side of my neck...

our two heads resting together...

our cheeks pressed together....

as we watched those two little flowers..

begin.....to BLOOM...

Rico reached around gently...softly...

and began to stroke a teardrop...

that had begun to fall..from my eye...

Reaching his hand around,

he...took the tip of that finger...

and put it on his tongue....

"Hoodlum...will...ALWAYS>..

take your tears...Bear..."

He whispered in my ear...

"Take them..and put them...

where you can't see them..

The sadness...and the hurt too..Bear...

ALL OF IT....

and...FOREVAH...BEAR...

FOREVAH.....

You will ALWAYS have ME...."

I turned my head slightly...

so as to look at my hoodlum...

as his lips gently moved onto mine...

SOOO SOFT....TENDERLY....

I almost fainted.....

**********************************************************

YEP

the PERFECT STORM...

and now...WE, like Nature..

had become NEW again...

Maybe, like those two little flowers...

NOW.....WE could BLOOM....

TOGETHER.......

After The Rain*....

*********************************************************

"The moments of happiness we enjoy take us by surprise.

It is not that we seize them, but that they seize us."

- Ashley Montagu

*********************************************************************

*"AFTER THE RAIN"

Music and Lyrics by Dustybear

COPYRIGHT C 2005 DUSTYBEAR

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

BOOK ONE

"THE DUSTYBEAR CHRONICLES"

All of the characters and events depicted herein are purely fictional.

Any similarity to any person or persons or events in actual existence are unintentional,

and purely coincidental



"DIME A DANCE"

Copyright C 2004 and
Copyright C 2005 DUSTYBEAR

and
"THE DUSTYBEAR CHRONICLES"
Copyright C 2005 and
Copyright C 2006 DUSTYBEAR

writerbear.com

"DUSTYBEAR " "DIME A DANCE"
AND "THE DUSTYBEAR CHRONICLES"
ARE THE PROPERTY OF THIS AUTHOR

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

ABSOLUTELY NO COPYING OR UNAUTHORIZED REPRINT
WITHOUT PERMISSION OF THE AUTHOR

WISHES OF IF...

If a kiss was a raindrop,
I'd send you showers.

If hugs were a second,
I'd send you hours.
If smiles were water, I'd send you the sea.

If friendship was a person, I'd send you me.

Copyright C 2005
by Dustybear
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

BROKEN SILENCE

THE SILENCE... broken by the howl without a mate fate please be kind bind me to this boi and let OUR joy howl.. through the night I fight the tears that like rivulets of white ingots burns my cheeks with their flow Will SOMEBODY GO... find him for me please? Seize him bring him so his love can cover while I hover underneath his fiery embrace I can feel my heart RACE at the thought I just bought this box of tissue Issue me two more for my tears have hit the floor One, two...many times Crimes of passion should be happening now How do I get it across to this my would be mate that our fate needs to...BE See? We can be free indeed I'M in NEED of you Okay, I'm through, and I await your word and your heart and YOU I'm sooo blue without you HOWLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL! Then let this be a HOWLING success. Save me, too. Enslave me, enrapture, embrace and race for the grand prize I surmise. If you were a road, I'd want to travel it til I could find you with my eyes closed Sensual, HOT...and hosed down to lessen the heat... STEAM! Ream the Dustybear... and I swear I'll be none the worse for wear Heart and soul. You are the song I long to sing 'til I know every word and every note as if I wrote every line I'm doing fine, after a word or two from you That would make my day.. You came to play and now I'd love for you to stay close like my heart and soul its cold...here, without your fire Come, take me higher way up fill my cup and let the love that binds us over flow 'til the river takes us, sometimes rough. sometimes gently to its ebb and though I CAN make it without you what a bum Come... stoke the fire and let the waves of crimson move us higher than we ever thought we could we would we should Knock on wood I'd be your BEST dude and our interlude would be truly SOMETHING Bring your BEST birthday suit Whatever it is would suit me fine sign off... cough.. grin I WIN hehe.. Hope the grand prize is not you... but US okay, fuss at me now... LISTEN TO THE QUIET You can almost hear two hearts BEAT tah dum..,tah dum... Strum me like a guitar... wonder how far...we could carry this tune JUNE? Soon...please. Seize me and LET THE MUSIC PLAY... Hey baby, come save me. Read me all those sweet lines like a vibe... and ride Just slide into my soul like a stride into my heart... Start...to beat out of control and take my toll so I can feel so alive... Strive to be the best. Better than the rest, and I know you can pass this test. Luv, I quiver and quake to the beat your words like symphonies play for me into the long hours of the night... Fight...to keep these dreams alive. I strive to be with you See into you...to breathe you in... Come again... rescue me from this abyss... It's you I miss...kiss. Howl. Dustybear COPYRIGHT C 2005 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

UNDERNEATH IT ALL

Underneath your clothes There's an endless story There's the dude I chose There's my territory My story starts there and ends wherever he is... and all the good things that he might deserve I will never reserve from him He's worth all the money He is my sunny day and in every way he is my Honeybear can I bear life without his love? Shove me in the furnace and melt me down to an ash smash my face race over with me wth a herd of buffalo so low would I be without that boi who sets my heart free and only he can pilot my light and bring me to flight all through every night forever more Copyright C 2003 Dustybear ALL RIGHTS RESERVED